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'Divorced Daughter Better Than Dead Daughter': Desi Twitter Discusses Toxic Marriages

Desi Twitter discussed divorce and societal pressure.

Desi Twitter discussed divorce and societal pressure.

A Twitter user started a conversation on how women should be able to divorce and leave toxic marriages without being judged by society.

Indian orthodox society often resists change and brands anyone who strays from norms as immoral, more so when it comes to women. Thanks to social media, not just millennials and Gen Zs, but also men and women from other generations stuck in toxic marriages, families and relationships are beginning to speak out. Recently, on Twitter, women broached the subject of divorce in India and many pitched in with their insights.

Twitter user Areebah started the conversation, saying “Not only is a divorced daughter better than a dead daughter but a divorced daughter is also better than a daughter who is unhappy and constantly suffering".

In response, many users shared their personal anecdotes to further her point. One of them spoke about standing up for his sister when she was going through a divorce, while another shared the struggles they faced from within their family while trying to leave a toxic relationship.


Many discussed the reasons as to why Indian women choose to stay on in toxic marriages, and they ranged from buckling under societal pressure, financial burdens to family pressure, lack of education and financial independence.

Some Twitter users suggested that the problem should be nipped at the bud. They said that many marriages end up being toxic because women are forced into unhappy alliances.

Since in India, marriage, divorce are inherently interrelated with religion, many users shared their perspective on divorce through the lens of religion. While some said that their religion allowed divorce, others wouldn’t go that far but conceded that it was a permissible option.

For others, the question is of existential nature. These users had a discussion on the ‘frying pan to fire’ situation entailed by a divorce scenario in India, where one goes from being in a toxic relationship to being in a toxic family that judges her for exiting the former.

Many discussed on how it was ultimately about liberation of women and the society not being conducive for them to realize their worth.

There was one user who pointed to the positive outcomes of a healthy family atmosphere that fosters independence in both men and women.

The Twitter thread did hold up a mirror to troubling realities of our society, but it also pointed to the fact that as long as the questions continue to be asked, there is yet hope for everyone.

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first published:July 21, 2021, 15:29 IST