From 4% to 8% ABV, beer is hardly notorious for painting faces red with blood. No binging. No throwing up. No zonking out. No fighting on the streets. No hard cases of hangovers. No scampering to get that hair of the dog, the morning after. A bottle of beer in hand may even slow down the pace of the earth with its coolness.
No wonder many beer-guzzlers even claim themselves to be teetotallers. "Meh, beer doesn't make one alcoholic, right?"
You haven't tasted the real stuff yet, Tippling point would say. Check out these five strongest beers in the world before you write off beer as meek and cool.
1. Snake Venom by Brewmeister
We have already met the strongest beer in the world, Snake Venom, in a previous story. The Scotland based brewery Brewmeister has been making this flagship beer for nearly a decade. With 67.5% ABV, Snake Venom is not meant to be trifled with. Remember, most of the whiskeys have only 40% alcohol, so this has to be treated like time bomb; savour it drop by drop.
The company also has taken extra precautions that they won’t sell you more than one bottle (275ml) at a time.
2. Armageddon Eisbock beer by Brewmeister
Brewmesiter's Armageddon Eisbock beer comes at the second with 65%. Unlike Snake Venom, this expression of beer holds more layers for the connoisseurs to unravel. Your mouth won't miss the flavours of hops, malt, and oats.
Again don't throw caution to the wind and dive deep into the drink for it may scald your skin with its intensity.
3. Start the Future by Koelschip
Koelschip, a brewery based in The Netherlands brews a beer named, 'Start the Future,' which has 60% ABV. As it is a limited brew, it would be as difficult to get it as sighting a unicorn. With water, malt, hops and yeast, Koelschip made this wonder in a reaction to another famous beer - 'The End of History', made by the Scottish distillery, BrewDog.
4. 'The End of History,' by BrewDog
Hope the name brings to your mind the famous political book of philosophy written by Fukuyama, American political scientist, political economist and writer. This ultra-limited blond Belgian ale, named after the name of the phenomenal book, is the most compelling of the high-potency beers. Take its packing. Each bottle is fitted into the cured carcass of a small rodent killed in some road accident. Why!
The brewers want to give you not just a drink, but an experience you'd never forget.
With 55% ABV, the beer would assail your mouth not only with its intensity, but also with hints of mead, juniper berries, and nettles. 'The End of History' is one of the most expensive beers in the world and it is also very difficult to get one.
5. Schorschbock 57 by Schorschbräu
Or why not go to Germany getting straight to Schorschbräu to drink its flagship beer Schorschbock 57? This Eisbock style beer with 57% alcohol made by freezing off a portion of the water from the brew is definitely not for the weak-hearted. Smoothness is not what the beer is popular for.
Most beers gain their high alcohol content by adopting a special method in order to shed its bland water content. Brewers freeze the liquid for a very long time until the water in the brew turns to ice, leaving behind a high concentration of alcohol.
Eisbock beer, a favorite in many European countries, is made after this fashion. Exactly the way applejack is made from cider.
So this week, drink with caution. There is more beer in your beer than you see.
(Manu Remakant is a freelance writer who also runs a video blog - A Cup of Kavitha - introducing world poetry to Malayalees. Views expressed here are personal)