Sexuality is often boxed to binaries but little is explored about the various shades of love that exist. One such less talked about form is demisexuality. When sexual attraction cannot be achieved without an emotional bond, that is known as demisexuality.
Sexual attraction can be based on a number of things. Looks, lust, gender, intelligence, and so on. A person for whom attraction begins with emotional attachment is known as demisexual. This should not be confused for asexuality where a person has no sexual attraction at all and can only form romantic/platonic relationships.
Demisexual can be used for a person of any gender any sexual orientation. Straight, lesbian, bisexual, or gay- anyone can be a demisexual. They need to first be close friends with great emotional bonding before you can feel any form of sexual attraction for the person.
But now the question arises, how do you know if you’re a demisexual?
Here are a few signs that you might be a demisexual.
You’ve only dated people you’ve been friends with
You have felt a deep connection with them, had a sense of trust and security. Gradually, that friendship turns into a romantic and sexual attraction. And it’s not a one-time thing. When you look back, you can see that all of your past relationships actually started off as deep, emotional friendships.
You take crushes very seriously
You don’t crush on just anyone. They are someone you know can be vulnerable with. But when the crush happens, it’s everything for you. It feels more than surface attraction and you feel there is a deep connection there.
Your relationships are often a cause of a great deal of dilemma for you. Being attracted to a friend can obviously lead to confusion about the nature of your friendship and you find yourself troubled with the idea of a possible relationship.
Strangers don’t attract you
Of course, there might be a surface attraction toward a stranger every once in a while, but it’s never there to last. It’s a very fleeting feeling and you can easily get over that superficial moment of crush.
Your friends call you prude
Since you don’t have sex with anyone you cannot be close with, people may think you are a prude. Though the judgements may hurt, but you simply cannot have one-night stands or casual, sexual relationships.